Saturday, August 20, 2016

The Last Walk


By: Andre' Hartslief









“Just a sweet story of a really great love that 

spans the distance of time...”


THE PIXIE FACE BEHIND the JACK-O- STACK

He was 7 and she was 6 and
full of tricks and so alive,
that summer's day,
at the Jack-o- lantern
stack, Halloween was
still quite new to him and her. Read on

SPECIAL POEMS BY ANDRE'


Lonely Rugged Shore

Cast away on a desolate island, passionate, yearning thoughts of his only love...

Feeling the touch of the morning breeze caressing his cheek,
the mournful cry of the lone seagull pecking at the piece
of flotsam washed up during the storm of the night before
and the ever washing of the waves onto the shore.READ ON

Tuesday, August 16, 2016

ADVERBS & CLICHES IN A NUTSHELL




Column by Jessica Bell, Australian-native contemporary fiction author 
and poet who also makes a living as an editor and writer for global ELT 
publishers (English Language Teaching), such as Pearson Education, 
HarperCollins, Macmillan Education, Education First and Cengage 
Learning. She is the co-publishing editor of Vine Leaves Literary Journal
and the director of the Homeric Writers’ Retreat & Workshop on the Greek 
island of Ithaca. For more information about Jessica please visit her:
Website | Blog | Twitter | Facebook. Find her newest book, ADVERBS & 
CLICHES IN A NUTSHELL on Amazon US or Amazon UK.

Today I’d like to draw your attention to one of the most common criticisms aspiring writers face, to “absolutely avoid adverbs and clichés like the plague.” But see, right now, I just used one of each. Because they come naturally, and we frequently utilize them in everyday speech. But in fiction, too many adverbs and clichés weaken your prose. It’s considered “lazy writing,” because it means we don’t have to show what’s happening.
If your manuscript has too many adverbs and clichés, it most likely means that the emotion you felt while writing it is not going to translate to the reader in the same way. Never underestimate the weakness of adverbs and clichés. You’d be surprised how vivid your writing will become once they are subverted.
Sure, clichés exist because they stem from things many of us experience in real life, and you may argue that they are “relatable,” so why not use them? But the way in which one experiences things isn’t always the same. As writers, it’s your duty to make readers experience your story from a unique point of view. Your point of view.
Before we go into details about how adverbs and clichés weaken prose, and how you can subvert them, first you need to understand that they aren’t always going to be a problem. In fact, you don’t need to go overboard trying to eliminate every single adverb and cliché in your manuscript. Because sometimes, they just work. They serve a purpose. Especially in dialogue. Of course, it also depends a lot on your character’s voice.
For example, sometimes it’s more concise to write, “She lightly knocked on the door.” Not every single action needs to be poetic and unique. Sometimes you need to write exactly what someone is doing because it’s not important enough to draw attention to. Also, if we just wrote, “She knocked on the door,” we’d have no idea whether it was loud or not. And if this action wasn’t all that significant, it would be a bit too wordy to say something like, “She knocked on the door as if her hand were as light as a feather.” (Look, cliché again, they creep in so easily, don’t they?)
But consider this: What if this person’s light knocking on the door was paramount to the story? What if it was a moment of suspense? What if behind that door was a man this person was afraid of? What if this person was anticipating being verbally abused for the interruption? Then this ‘lightly knocking on the door’ would have a significant purpose, yes?
The action of lightly knocking on that door is no longer a simple transitional action that moves the character from A to B. It is in your manuscript for a reason. You put it there for your readers to feel the same apprehension your character feels. And no adverb or cliché, as you can see, is going to draw attention to that moment of intensity like something crafted for it exclusively.
So let’s try our hand at making this moment pop. How about, “She tapped on the door. It echoed in her ears like an axe to a carcass.”
So how does this better convey its intended sentiment? I’d say the fact that this person perceives their tap on the door as a deep, echoing, and unpleasant sound means that they are anxious about the reaction it is going to elicit. Also note that I’ve chosen the verb (tap) which means “a light knock,” so there is no reason for me to use the adverb “lightly.”
So how exactly can we approach the subversion of adverbs and clichés? For starters, play around with similes and metaphors when you’re trying to convey emotion, and for action, use strong verbs to show it happening in real time. For example, instead of using something clichéd like “the streets were so quiet you could hear a pin drop,” find a small detail to zoom in on that shows how quiet the streets are. Put a lonely-looking man kicking rubbish down an abandoned street, perhaps. Have him drag his feet. Perhaps the sound can be heard from two blocks away where your narrator is waiting for a bus that never arrives.
Most of the time, if you think of the small details, rather than the bigger picture, you’ll avoid adverbs and clichés naturally. And remember to be experimental. You never know what you might come up with.
GIVEAWAY: Jessica is excited to give away a free copy of her book to a random commenter. Comment within 2 weeks; winners can live anywhere in the world. You can win a blog contest even if you’ve won before. (Update: RebeccaReynolds won.)


USEFULL LINKS

Slaughter The Adverbs


Bestselling author Stephen King once said:
"The road to hell is paved with adverbs."
Before I go into detail about how adverbs and clichés weaken prose, and how you can delete them, you first need to understand that they aren’t always going to be a problem, and you don’t have to go overboard trying to eliminate every single adverb and cliché from your copy. Because sometimes, they just work. So,they do serve a purpose. Especially in dialogue. Of course, it also depends a lot on the voice of the character.
Sometimes it’s more concise to write, “She lightly knocked on the door.” Not every action you are writing about needs to be poetic and unique. There are time you need to write exactly what someone is doing because it’s not important enough to draw attention to. 
Also, if we just wrote, “She knocked on the door,”  your reader will have no idea whether it was loud or not. And if this action wasn’t all that significant, it would be a bit too wordy to say something like, “She knocked on the door as if her hand were as light as a feather.” (Did you see that cliché again, they sneak in so quietly, don’t they?)

These teeny-tiny writing obstacles are  In most cases, adverbs modifying verbs. you can delete the limp adverb and choose a bolder verb.
For instance:
  • She walks slowly — She saunters; she strolls; she strides.
  • He said loudly — He barked; he yelled; he shrieked.
  • He talked aimlessly — He blabbered; he digressed; he yakked.
  • They worked really hard — They slaved; they labored; they toiled.
  • They ate their dinner greedily — They wolfed down their dinner; they devoured their dinner; they inhaled their dinner.
More'o this ahead!